As a parent with young kids, finding time to recharge can feel impossible. But it is so essential, at least for me. I think about the phrase "put on your oxygen mask first" when it comes to my own self-care which includes quiet alone time. As an introvert this kind of time is the difference between feeling like myself and being overwhelmed. Personally I love having time to journal or to work on enjoyable projects like family photobooks or planning Christmas at a leisurely pace. I can tell that I am a more calm and present parent when I have... Read more →

I'm sitting alone in a quiet, empty house. It is a revelation. The revelation is not only the fact of these hours today but that this will happen again later this week. And again next week. For the first time since early March 2020 my weeks will have some predictability, routine, and, most importantly, consistent time to myself. I think it's the beginning of a new season. I don't think I've ever experienced such a long stretch of time with so little dependable time to myself. Simultaneously I've been navigating demanding emotional and physical challenges. There's been the anxiety over... Read more →

Usually I'm a glass half-full kind of gal but lately it's been easier for me to see what's not working rather than what's going really well. A recent post by Sarah reflecting on what's great versus what's hard inspired me to write my own reflection. When one or a few things are hard in life I can use that paintbrush to color everything. Taking a step back to be more precise about what's hard and, importantly, what's not hard helps me to stop globalizing. Challenging + Very limited time to work or "time off." Essentially I feel like I'm trying... Read more →

A question I'm often asked is how the transition has been from being a full-time working mom to being an at-home parent. As I started to write this post I realized I have a lot to say. I thought about breaking this up into a few posts but instead I'm going to leave it as one giant post so all my thoughts are in one spot. I'll touch on why I quit my full-time job as a science writer three years ago, how my days go now, my thoughts on finding my value and identity after being a full-time working... Read more →

Happy FIRST birthday to our Maeve! We met her one year ago today. After waiting and waiting ten days past her due date, Maeve arrived in a speedy but peaceful birth. Outside the birth center a global pandemic was gripping the world but I felt cocooned in love and calm that morning. The first thing I said when Maeve was in my arms was, "It's really a girl!" After she was born Maeve was quiet and alert and she started up at me for a long time. Born at 9 a.m., we were home with her by 1 p.m. Now... Read more →

Chris attended a neighborhood protest. After I took this picture he added the "[forward]" at the bottom. Being anti-racist isn't something to check off a list. It's a lifelong practice of learning, examining my own privilege and bias, doing better, showing up, and modeling and teaching anti-racism to my kids. Repeat, repeat, repeat. In thinking about how to continue practicing anti-racism I thought about what I can do at different effort levels. Because even at this time while I have little bandwidth and am at home I can still be actively anti-racist. What I've come up with for now is... Read more →

Despite having had a newborn twice before, for the first few nights after Maeve was born I found myself wondering, "How does this newborn sleep stuff work exactly?" Thankfully, over the past month the best practices for newborn sleep and handing night wakings have come back to me as I've also developed a sense of what works for Maeve. These nights of being awake so much and of helping a baby adjust to swaddling and sleeping on their back is ultimately a very short time. But when you are in it those dark hours can seem to stretch forever. So... Read more →

I wrote most of this post shortly after Maeve arrived when I was experiencing the evening blues that I'll describe here. I'm happy to report that around two weeks postpartum I started to feel my emotions even out and I'm not experiencing bluesy evenings any more. Since giving birth to Maeve I’ve found myself having a particular feeling: I feel really nostalgic for now. Can you relate to that feeling? Is there a word for it? What I’m feeling isn’t postpartum depression — I don’t have feelings of anxiety, wanting to withdraw, or other indicative symptoms — although I’m open... Read more →

When the boys are bored (plenty of opportunity for that lately) they'll often say "no" when I suggest an activity I want to do with them: Can I read you a book? Want to do a puzzle? Play a game? No, no, no. But something they are always up for is an activity they first did at my sister-in-law's house: no recipe baking! As the name implies, no recipe baking is mixing up ingredients to your heart's delight, putting it in the oven, and seeing what you get. They are thrilled by it every time! I will admit that as... Read more →

At first I titled this post "March Wrap Up" and was so confused for several seconds to see that I've already written that post. What day is it? What month is it? April 2020 was a month of significance: Ten years of marriage. Welcoming our daughter, Maeve Elizabeth. Becoming a family of five. A full month of self-isolating because of a global pandemic. At times life has felt the happiest it’s ever been but then also hard and weird. I felt a range of emotions last month from impatient waiting for Maeve; overjoyed to finally be holding her; nostalgic for... Read more →